Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Talking Nice

Through the nice talk, nice posture, nice walk

While you have been improving yourself to be elegant, your mind and body must be shaped together in accordance.


Let’s see how you can get the specialities of Nice Speech and Graceful and Natural Posture on your body by yourself.


I will try to explain the ways for nice speech and attitude by the classic manners and the modern adaptations


Nowadays, being natural is an undividable part of being graceful.

It means you to make the grace become your nature which needs you have used to live.

When you add what i’ve been writing in this Blog inside your life; you can be graceful and natural.


In a place a business meeting, coctail, dinner, tea-party, class reunion, school parents day or the first date... the point is not where you are... The people are used to know once or know you the first, who are impressed of your behaviors, speech and voice after your appearance.


To be admired; to choose instead of be-chosen; to decide and just tell instead of be-decided after analizing; you can stand nice; you can look nice, talk nice and smile gracious...


To allow elegant, you must be ‘‘Elegant’’. So, you must have the good and useful virtues.


The first impression is at the first sight



Have you ever met once?

Sometimes, a woman attracts the sights naturally with only her attitude, a lower but clear voice, a small bend on her neck, a soft manner by her hand... You think why it’s her!

She is grace.

When she talks the others get silence to listen...

Oooops! I think i’ve described You! The ‘‘You’’, is so soon ;)


‘‘TALKING NICE’’ talking nice


To talk nice...your voice must be soft and your words are clear.


- Talk understandable. A monotone speech voice is boring.


- Add to your speech, all the emotions, accents and tunings in a plain way.


- At the beginning, the strength and understandable voice of you doesn’t go down and lost through the end of your speech. You need to breath at the right places for that.


Yes, the lessons are given for talking nice. Actually, i also give the lessons for talking nice. You can just carry out the clues in my blog, now.


Practise talking nice by yourself; as reading loudly and listening your own voice like you are from out of your own.

First of all, your speech sounds good to you. That’s easy. You just need to pay attention.


RIGHT BREATH WHILE TALKING AND READING:

right breath while talking reading

- At the start of your talk; inhale to stomach and swell it by supporting the diaphragm. (to a wide area under your chest) Breath from mouth, silent. Actually, this is the regular breath.


- We use the punctuation while talking, too.

Attentively, as reading loudly and taking your time, you will get a hunch which gives alert at the right puncts to you breath.


- Breath at the dots and semicolons; and through the sentence, exhale homogeneously.


- You may breath after the subject, when the subject includes a few words long.


–While talking; you need breath for needed, breath for expression, and break for impression (=a break breathless for one moment).


Breath for Need may take a half or 1 second. Breath for Expression is a small breath takes one moment. And Break for İmpression is a breathless moment to be-atracted words.

For example:

‘‘.......All these young souls were passengers in the Durbeyfield ship –entirely dependent on the judgement of the two Durbeyfield adults for their pleasures, their necessities, their health, even their existence. If the heads of the Durbeyfield household chose to sail into difficulty, disaster, starvation, disease, degradation, death, thither were these half douzen little captives under hatches compelled to sail with them –six helpless creatures, who had never been asked if they wished for life on any terms, much less if they wished for it on such hard conditions as were involved in being of the shiftless house of Durbeyfield..............’’

(from the novel ‘‘Tess of The D’urbervilles’’ by Thomas Hardy)


Now, let’s say at this passage, the breath for needed is called as (N) and breath here because of you need to your stomach by the support of diaphragm. The breath for expression is called as (E) and breath here one moment. The break is symbolized as (B) and have a break to read (talk) for one moment breathless.

P.S.: Breath silent ;)


Let’s read, once more:

‘‘.......N All these young souls E were passengers in the Durbeyfield ship N –entirely dependent E on the judgement of the two Durbeyfield adults N for their pleasures, their necessities, their health, E even their existence!!! N If the heads of the Durbeyfield household B chose to sail into difficulty, E disaster, starvation, disease, degradation, death, thither N were these half douzen little captives E under hatches compelled to sail with them N–six helpless creatures, E who had never been asked if they wished for life on any terms, N much less if they wished for it E on such hard conditions as were involved E in being of the B shiftless house of Durbeyfield..............’’

(from the novel ‘‘Tess of The D’urbervilles’’ by Thomas Hardy)

Have you heard the re-animation of the passage by your voice which has already written very impressive?

Yes? You can proud of your own. This passage is strong to read nice and need to pay attention.


HOW CAN YOU PRACTISE YOURSELF WHILE GETTING TO TALK NICE ?

practise to talk nice

1- Listen the interviews with the actors and the speakers. You can listen them; not in the plays, movies, series, shows; but in their regular lives with the interviews. Listen them without looking; only hear them.

(For example; Andie MacDowel talks so elegant on her nature. And Juliette Binoche. Meryl Streep, Emma Thompson... Do your own search and discover the people who you like to hear. Do not imitate them. The reason of your listennings is to hear the right examples in talking and self-expressing.

Be natural and hesitate to talk louder with the exaggerating gestures.

Your aim is to be grace as behaving natural and being yourself.


2- Read the novels, the plays loudly... Not like a conference or not like you are on the the stage but natural and you are a character from that novel or the play...like everythings have been making happened in your room and like all lines have been coming out from your mouth with the emotions, reflects... Read and talk.

Of course, you are not an actress... Anyway, you can talk nice.


While choosing your books, prefer the characters and the subjects are real and inside of us.


For example; you can read Emile Zola, Victor Hugo, Charles Dickens, Thomas Hardy, William Faulkner, Taylor Caldwell, i like very much Simone de Beauvoire, Turgeniev... and the other magnificient authers you like and feel close to your soul and your life.


Take a person inside of them and be that. Or thake more than one.

Then read it’s lines with all emotions, accents, tunings, punctuations, breaths without exeggerating and being yourself.

You’ll see in time that your speech has been changed to more soft, clear, understandable, polite; elegant.


While talking and reading; your voice must sound nice on you, previously.

When you like your talking, then you’ve done a good job! :)


3- If you have a friend from outside, that must learn everything right from you.


4- If it is possible you may record your voice while reading and talking. Have you liked your speech while listening? Bravvo!


P.S.: You can write for everything what you can’t decide about talking nice from the ‘‘comments’’. Our conversation would be useful for the other blog-friends.


When the books which you choose to practise are literary will also improve your literate and intellect beside talking nice and elegant.


Keep your enthusiasm and liveliness... I wish you the joyous days.


il-han ilhan hande


The next: Nice Posture, Nice Walk

Sunday, September 8, 2013

Improve yourself to change your life...

Improve yourself to change your life...

Commencing...
Welcome!

This blog is a guide which will support you allow the 'Elegant' and take you to your new ‘Elegant Life’.

You need a bit taking care and planning time to change your current life to the more colourful and elegant one. The ‘Elegant Life’ of the ‘Elegant Woman’ may be yours.

In these days, we have been hearing very often the word ‘elegant’ is from French Language in base. And it means the one (the thing) who has fine, useful and eligible virtues.

You may wish to have a life which presents better possibilities than you have in current.
And you know that you are high-potentialed, clever; but also a bit undecided, sad due to a few mistakes and a little broken-hearted...
You may be standing in the middle of family, friends, media trends and may be thinking how you will take your right way.
However, you may still have a keep to re-try and false...which is not necessary. Easy.

You will keep your strength, intelligence and grace which you have inside, was born as a woman.
Then you will become an ‘Elegant Woman’ make her own style, bring notice and be-followed icon; has self-confidence and flowing away as leaving her impression like a fragrance on air...
Naturally, you can taste which is presented your new ’Elegant Life’.

An eye on you outer-most ...
You can tell yourself easy to a person who has no pre-judge on you and never met before.
That has no reason to make a gossip or prevent you.
That listen you honestly and looks at you objective, then comment as an eye on you outer. That’s what you’ve already needed not to repeat your former mistakes and to prepare your new life: An honest eye on you from outer.

Through your New Life...
I will give you the clues which you need to have the life as you’ve expected.
This is a process will take a time from 3 months through 1 year, depending on the speed that you making them true in your life.

You’ve made your current life. And now, you have been changing your life.
It is a ‘Life’ which presents many opportunities; social, including the new gates and meetings in person.
You have to adapt yourself to your new life. Otherwise, this kind of life will not accept you inside.

In this blog, you will see how you will be more kind, grace, attractive, careful, intellectual, kind gestured, behaviors in the meetings and parties, to balance your speech-voice, make-up colours, grace clothing, nice attitude and walking, controlling your body-weight and fitness, the importence to interest the right topics and hobby and the importence to know a foreign language and timing; the smell of your parfume and the decollete of your gown...

Thus, you will improve yourself to have a better life.

You don’t need to be very rich, yet ;) You have your mind to utilize.

I want to be near you in each of your steps...
While you have been improving and becoming beauty; please share with me, everything! While going up, each step of you is important for me.

We have the corner for your shares... ‘Former you’ and ‘Fresh You’... Write to me from the ‘comments’.
During your way, share us your step-ups and conclusions what you do as reading our blog.
Write your course day by day.

We will admit the appointments and connect to eachother direct, in periods.
When you need I will be at the other side of your comments, messages and questions.

We’ve met; we’ve kept our strength, so.... Here we go!

2 Important Steps to Change Your Life... important steps to change your life

At the fist step; you will describe your conditions in real and define your matters.
It takes a few days at most.

Please take a small note-book. At the end of the day, try to have an hour to stay by yourself.
Now, write in your notebook what you’ve done during the day as a schedule.
(Example: The line 1; ‘I prepared breakfast to the children and sent them to the school- at 7:00-7:45 AM/ Line 2 ; i picked up house -30 min/ take a shower 15 min./ go to shopping 1 hr, etc.) or
(Example: wake up and prepared at 7:00-7:30 / the office: 8:00/ lunch break12:00A.M./ coming home: 5:00 P.M., etc.)

Write your last one week. If you don’t remember past, write it the week ahead.
1 Page is one day.
Your small notebook is called as ‘the notebook to built new elegant me)

OBLIGATIONS: On your schedule, write ‘O’ next to the Obligations.
Like school, job for earning money, about children or family things...

Now, try to be objective to yourself; and ask:
‘Is this responsibility of mine a real obligation for me? Can i share it with another family member? Can i change the hours or the date of it? Can i make it lighter? Can i re-adapt it with my new life?’

Your answer for this question is very important.
You are trying to create more time belongs to you.
You must be sure if this is a real obligation or you’ve thought it is and got a duty.

Consult about your obligations to the people you trust in your life.

If you can’t be sure about the answer; you can ask it to me from the ‘Comments’ as explaining your obligation? in detail.

P.S.: When you write your issue in ‘Comments’; our dialog would be useful for our other blog-friends. They also may have the similar matters.

Add your goal at the end of every page of your notebook:
‘I am a woman having a potential to be ‘Elegant’; and the ‘Elegant Life’ which i am belong to, waits for me.’

At the second step, may come true from 3 months through 1 year. This is a process that you need to try your self-improvement.
What can you do for yourself? Which places can you visit?
How kind a woman do you expect to become, now?

Please, write to me 'how kind a woman you expect to become?' Let’s talk about it, together.

The List for Emergency Starters : list to do emergency to improve yourself

While you have been improving yourself on behaving, walking, being kind and grace; you also need to care your body and intellectuality.
Otherwise, improving yourself to be an Elegant Woman has an Elegant Life would be half.
You take yourself care at all and everyone must be adore you...

Take your small notebook.
You have already written everything you’ve done.
Now, you know your spare times. Which hours you have exactly.
You will decide, how you spend your time.

If you prefer to follow this blog; re-place the things to do in the following on your spare times.

1-Have a walk 3 days a week 20-40 minutes.
Or if you have any opportunity try to body-shape, pilates, yoga, streching, or simple body-workout exercises from the school yards, do that.
The point is to move and make strength your body.
Do you have 40min. in the morning?
Have a walk 20min; take a shower, wear nice in 18min. And join to the life outside!

P.S.: Time is valuable. Be quick :)

2- Can you speak and read in a foreign language? You can do.
Take a language you think the speech sounds nice. If you have any opportunity; attend on a class.
Unless you do; no matter. To learn a foreign language by yourself is enjoyable!

Things to do:
- Go to a book-store. It may also be a second-hand book seller. (I like to discover new books there)
- Find a language book (which is you choose) is full of conversations and many pictures according to your level.
- Buy the dictionary.
- Find a story book even for children in that language. (Or the stories for beginner)
- If you like to watch the movies, it’s wonderful. Take the dvd’s with original voice and subtitles.
While reading the subtitle, try to hear the words, pronounciations, tunnings...
- In the office, when your manager says ‘This week, we have the foreign visitors for business’; be volunteer to guide to them.
-Don’t afraid! Be calm and cheerful. When you make a mistake; smile...

P.S.: I will write about methods of studying a foreign language by yourown in a seperate article.
This is an important subject, i will explain it in detail.

3- Read three columnist in the news, everyday. You can also read them on the web.
Have a general opinion what happens in your country and in the world.
Also have a look at the news about travel, art and sport pages. Memorize the symphatic news.
You will utilize them later. (In a parti, a meeting, a first date. Having a general opinion is fine)

4- Discover an intellectual and social interest (hobby) you like.
(Clue topics:
cinema- first, have a search the popular directors and the actors.
Then choose a period and focuse.
-archeology, history, ancients, etc.
These are very wide topics. Choose a period or geographic area, location as a frame for your topic. Then learn more in that frame.
Fine arts- Now, the point is not to paint or taking photographs by your own.
(If you are talented, how nice: go ahead)
The point is to have the intellectual knowledge. Choose a branch among painting, sculpturing, graphics, photographing... Then, take a period or style and focuse that’s emotion, artists, see their works, make your own opinion according to your learnings and feelings...
Etc...

Meet with the conversation groups share the same interests with you. Visit the art galleries.
Talk to them. It will develope your expressing yourself and knowledge.
Don’t hesitate; you’re welcome with cheerfulness, nice wear, kind and meaningful speech.

P.S.: Search and decide for you hobby.
If you can’t catch the right key words you need to make your search easy; you can write to me.

(I will write about ‘wearing right’, later.)

Go outside: Reading, walking... Do out of house, all things you do.
Stay home only for your needs. Life is out of the house in the most.

Beside, in the real places, you can come together with the real people who may expect to know you because of sharing the similar interests to you.
I think that’s what you expect...

5- Take care your family; don’t ignore them. The family, the parents are the most valuable. Visit them regularly; do for them what you can.
It is impossible to be elegant not to care the family.
Talk to them; if you are far, call them. Visit regular and try to make easier their life. Help them even to pick their houses, shoping, know how their life is with respect and sincerity.

6- Do whatever you do genuinely and smile.

At the end of this article...
If you read the Blog here. That’s wonderful!!!
You really wish to do very good things for your life; to change somethings, to develope and to be elegant.

If you read the article imagine what you need to do once more:
-Have your small notebook; write your routin and see the times you have.
- Choose an intellectual hobby.
- Read the news, special the travel, art and sport. (Plus business woman may be; or woman poetries, etc.)
- Decide which language you like to talk. Then try to study.
- To catch the qualifying time outside. (We will talk about this in detail)

As you see, you have the things to do and i have the things to write.
All may cause to happen very enjoyable and exciting developments for life.

Write to me from ‘Comments’ as you have been practising what you’ve read here. Waiting...
I’d like to know how you have been doing in your lives and write to you the articles according to your steps.
Beside, all our blog-friends, see how you’ve been going eachothers of you.

Smile and trust yourself :) i wish you having joyous days...

il-han ilhan hande